A Mothers Attempt at Getting Sexy Back

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I was intrigued by this idea. Maybe I could even extend my pinkie as I daintily clutch my ounce beverage. For instance if you want teenage girls to quit using straws have Lululemon make reusable ones. And if Louis Vuitton comes out with a reusable straw collection every mom currently not obeying the rules of the school drop off line will suddenly become ardent reusable straw fanatics. Now excuse me while I select the monogram for my straw case. Do I want interlocking or a diamond?

My cousin is getting married in December and she told all five of her bridesmaids that we have to go on the Keto diet or else. None of the bridesmaids are even what I would call fat. I think I would forget about being classy and just tell this monster of a bride that if being a bridesmaid in her wedding means humiliating yourself and allowing her to interfere in your personal business up to and including your private health information than you are tendering your bridesmaid resignation effective immediately.

If this shrew throws a fit so be it.

Just walk away with your pride in tact and under no circumstances let other family members try to talk you back into being a bridesmaid. The focus of my wrath is my appliances. None of them have even celebrated their fifth birthday. Quick back-story — My parents owned a Kenmore washer and dryer in a not so very fetching shade of harvest gold. They purchased this duo when I was in kindergarten and both the washer dryer outlived my parents! Who makes appliances that last almost 50 years?

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Meanwhile, I have appliances that are basically still in their infancy going on life support. Of course I know about the concept of planned obsolescence. Last month, when our dishwasher started making a sound that made me think evil spirits possessed the Cascade pods I was using and were performing an exorcism on the rinse aid dispenser I immediately summoned by husband for help.

I went online to try to determine the problem and after two hours of my head in the dishwasher I gave up and, you guessed it, called for professional help.

The next week when the refrigerator started leaking water I entered the deluxe ticked off zone. My husband, apparently more comfortable with a drippy frig than a demonic dishwasher was confident he could fix it. This meant he went straight to YouTube for refrigerator tutorials. The assorted YouTube frig techs were unanimous that the refrigerator had an inherent design flaw and was doomed.

This was a line in the sand for me. I was going to subvert the leak. This means that once a week I have to do frig first aid. The leak collects in the lower part of the refrigerator and for some reason freezes and then it melts which results in a leaky frig. My ER duties included soaking up the water with a beach towel and then getting a knife and chopping up the ice that has collected.

I will no longer be at the mercy of the planned obsolescence overlords. Plus, have you priced new refrigerators lately? I will use a Coleman camping cooler before I pay four figures for a refrigerator. This is why you will find me every week armed with towels, a butter knife and brute force going to battle with planned obsolescence. Some may call me crazy but I prefer the word warrior. There were times when I was scared, bewildered, angry and tear stained. I ranted at the world and shouted curses. My pilgrimage of self-discovery started out with me attempting to lower our cable bill.

My goal was to get our cable bill down enough to match what we would have to pay if we cut the cord and had to pony up for additional streaming services. I marched into the cable company ready to battle. The woman helping me was very matter-of-fact, like she had heard this all before, and pointed out that a significant chunk of our bill was for super high speed Internet.

She knew she had me. The customer service rep did discover that we could save money just by getting an updated digital video recorder. In another devastating revelation, Moore also found out the man she knew and loved as her dad was actually not her biological father. Upon finding out, she said she told herself "that I wasn't wanted, or that I don't deserve to be here. After her father and mother divorced, Moore lived at home with her unstable mother. As a young, anxious teen, her mom would bring her along to bars so that men would take notice.

When she was 15, she wrote, she came home to an older man they knew in their apartment with a key. I don't think it was a straightforward transaction," she said about whether she thought her mom sold her. Moore dropped out of high school as a teenager and left her mom's home to invent a future for herself. She signed up to go on acting auditions without any formal training. Moore got her lucky break at 19 years old in "General Hospital.

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In , Moore landed a role in "St. Elmo's Fire" and was cast as a part she knew all too well -- a reckless party girl. But before filming, the producer and director insisted that she go to rehab, and Moore said it was "a profound gift that they gave me. Ready to save money and a bit of sanity, mama? Check out these items and more online now through September Your little musician will stay busy exploring more than 20 stimulating activities with lights and sounds, including drums, music note sliders, a tambourine, a microphone rattle, and more.

They can even play the keyboard with their feet; the soft interactive play mat makes noise, too. Hearing baby entertain themself while you get to multitask will be music to your ears! Guns 'N Roses got it right when they sang, "Welcome to the jungle, we've got fun and games! When they're tired of rocking out , there's a kickstand to hold it in place and calming vibrations to soothe.

Baby can rock, bounce, spin, and reach in this sweetly designed exersaucer. While you're preparing dinner or scarfing down lunch, your little one can be enjoying their own tea party, complete with stacking cakes, a fun flip book, a self-discovery mirror, and other fine motor activities. Toss the removable seat cover in the washing machine when it needs cleaning because messes are inevitable in the kitchen. Kitchen tables aren't just for eating—and neither are high chairs! Let your little one keep you company in the kitchen in this adjustable high chair that converts into six different seating options ranging from an infant high chair to a youth seat.

Safely secured with your choice of either a 3- or 5-point harness, they can play with toys on the dishwasher safe tray while you get things done.


Bringing Sexy Back

When baby's acting fussy, give your arms a rest and let this cozy infant swing rock them 'til they're calm. You can even customize it based on your little one's preferences; the music-playing swing can move side-to-side or front-to-back. Plus, there's a plush mobile and mirrored dome to help distract them from whatever was causing that irritability in the first place.

This article was sponsored by Walmart. Thank you for supporting the brands that support Motherly and mamas. As a new mom, you hear quite a bit about identity loss. It's probably the thing that many new mamas struggle with the most. The sleep deprivation, feelings of total ineptitude and leaky boobs have a life-span, an expiration date, but the identity loss? Well, as I have discovered 14 months after the birth of my little thief, it has a much longer shelf-life.

While pregnant with our daughter, my husband and I were so confident that she wouldn't change our lives—she would fit in with them. A position that seems quite common amongst today's older, independent and ambitious parents-to-be. I only half-listened to my mom's concerned warnings that everything was about to change.

She nagged that I needed to be prepared, and I dismissively nodded, comforted by the notion that she was "from another generation. She was just being old-fashioned. When my daughter arrived and my world flipped upside down overnight I was totally knocked out of breath. To say I was overwhelmed would be an understatement. And I continue to be on a daily basis. Yes, pregnant women do learn about cluster feeding, mastitis, sleep deprivation and falling into a time vortex, but when you're sitting in the antenatal class with your excitement as big as your bump, these are just words.

The not so daily vlog s01e05 - Bringing SEXY back with mother-in-law

Small inconveniences that you won't even notice once you have a tiny baby in your arms. For some women, I am sure this is the case. But for others, myself included, these "words" turn into insurmountable challenges they are totally unprepared for. I struggled with all the normal things—loneliness, exhaustion, raging hormones, self-doubt and being overly critical of myself.

I missed my friends. I missed exercising. I missed eating with a knife and fork. I even missed work. A lot. Overnight I transformed from a successful, smart, fun-loving woman, into an emotionally incontinent wreck, called "mama. I was incapable of having a conversation that didn't start with "My daughter…" or "I only slept for…". I felt devoid of interests—I just watched Netflix on the sofa with a large barnacle attached to my boob. Those first few months passed in a bit of a blur. But as I started to emerge from the fog, and get some time sans-barnacle, I began searching for my former self.

And boy did I spend a lot of time searching. I looked for her at the gym. On nights out with my friends. Date nights. I tried to rouse her through my old wardrobe. High heels and running shoes.

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I spent a lot of time during the first year of my daughter's life trying to find the old me. But nothing worked. And in fact, she's still missing in action. Now while that may sound a little sad and depressing, in reality, it isn't. I haven't lost my identity, I have gained a new one.

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One in which much of my old self still exists, just with a few adjustments. I am grateful for a quiet coffee, a shower by myself, a glass of wine with a friend. I no longer expect these simple pleasures, which makes them feel even more indulgent. I have made new friends. I have launched a business, which never would have happened had I not given birth.

The thing that actually is sad is that it has taken me 14 months to realize this. Fourteen months of denying the unavoidable and undeniable truth that becoming a mother has changed me. And while not all of that change is immediately positive, being able to accept it, and even welcome it, makes me much happier. And I encourage all new moms to try and find the courage to do the same. You don't just "have a baby," you become a mother. A new role. A new challenge. A new identity. And despite what society might have you believe, it doesn't happen overnight.

It takes time. It's taken me a year. And just like the hungry caterpillar, I have had to learn to use my new wings before realizing their beauty. There's a lot of work that happens behind the scenes of Motherly's heartwarming videos and emotional essays—and an incredible team who brings Motherly's magic to life each day. Our remote team of almost 40 come from all over the country and Portugal!

This week, we're in New York City reflecting on our growth from the past year and celebrating what's to come—all to ensure we're meeting TeamMotherly exactly where you need us. Known as the most packable backpack ever seriously, it zips completely flat! Those who flew in for summit especially appreciated it to bring back all of their extra goodies. Added bonus: The wash kit can hold all of your toiletries and cosmetics.